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Tom Willoughby was born in 1992, his mum was so disappointed with her first born, that she offered Britney Spears £50 to take "it" off her hands.


Living with Britney


Britney didnt want him, chucked him on the streets.

The street life

Willoughby was turfed on the street at the age of 4,he was taken in by a jewish family from Chicago, however they thought he was a bellend and kicked him out at the age of 17, he was left to fend for himself, and got a job at a coffee shop cleaning toilets.

With his first paycheck, Willoughby bought a portable DvD player, he started reviewing movies, however when he applied to Harvard to do "Journalism", they laughed alot and he was subject to racial abuse, with names not to be uttered over the internet.


2010 -2013

Tom joined the ATP Tennis tour at the age of 18, and subsequently lost his first match to Boggers (citation needed) and morphed into his alter ego of Tommy Tosspot, however they struck a bond and became the 21,723rd best mens doubles team in Britain. In 2013, Tom got his first win of his career, beating a child with Downs syndrom who'd had a stroke, Willoughby won 7-6 3-6 6-4. He retired after realising he had nothing else to offer to the game.

Date of death

 Tom died on January 7th 2014, due to infertility, so decided to hang himself out of shame that he will never carry om the family name. We will always remember him as the Tim Henman of our era.

Famous Quotes

"Look at me, i'm a movie goer"

"Me and Alex can win Wimbledon"

"Females are god's mistake"

"When god made Bowling for soup, he was showing off"

"Fuck Britney, i did"

Tom Willoughby

Nickanames

Tom, Tommy, Willo, Willoughby, Boggers and Toms crazy adventure, Tiger Tom

"NO!"

"They're crap!"

"Shut up!"

"You must be so proud"

"It has to be done though [insert name here]"

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